Lawren’s Transition Journey
Lawren, from Lost In Transition, reveals why it is so important for her to share her transition journey and gives helpful advice for those considering their own transitions.
Lawren knows the ins and outs of the often difficult transition process and is sharing some of her biggest lessons and pieces of advice from her own journey. If you are transgender and thinking about coming out for the first time, use this resource for strategies on how to share this new phase of your life with loved ones. Then read about Lawren's experience as a transgender woman.
Why was it important to you and your family to share the journey of your transition?
It was important for us to share our journey because we wanted to let others know they are not alone. In the very beginning, we didn't understand what was going on and we didn't know where to begin to look for resources. We tried to connect with others like us but struggled to find them. We joined support groups and became more active in the transgender community and, over time, met some amazing couples. Although every journey is unique, we're all telling a similar story. Jennifer and I are just two people who love one another completely. We hope to open hearts and minds in the days and weeks to come. In our family, we say, "Open one heart. Open one mind. Save one life."
What is the biggest lesson you've learned since starting your transition?
The biggest lesson I've learned so far since starting my transition is that I'm not the only one in transition. My wife, children, friends, family, and, to some extent, my community are all going through a transition along with me. And while I've had years to work through my transition to this point, for them it's only just begun. A great example is my wife, Jennifer. It is impossible for me to know where I end and where she begins. We have been one for so long. My transition has been slow because, with every decision, I have given great consideration to her feelings and needs. I try to be patient and understanding of how my transition may impact people in my life.
Describe a moment when you first started to feel like your true self.
A moment when I started to feel like myself was when I finally figured out my personal style. I started to feel comfortable in my own skin for the first time. Up until that point, I felt like everyone was staring at me for the all the wrong reasons. While that feeling hasn't gone away completely, I'm less conscious of the stares and more in tune with myself.
What advice would you give to others starting their transitions?
The advice I would give to others starting their transition would be to have patience. Your journey is unique and will be different from anyone else's journey. It took me a long time to figure out what was going on. Initially, I had no idea why I felt disconnected from myself. My road to acceptance has not been an easy one. I fought transitioning because I did not want to hurt my wife or my children. I pushed is down year after year because I refused to believe it was true. I now understand that accepting myself and being myself is the best for not only me but also for my family. Transitioning isn't something to be rushed. Explore who you are and allow yourself time to figure things out. Others will see you more clearly when you begin to see yourself for who you truly are.
Watch more of Lawren's story on the two-hour season finale of Lost In Transition Sunday, July 8 at 10/9c on TLC. Learn more about how to support trans families and their allies at TLC.com/TransitionResources.